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11
A: I'm in a big trouble!
B: Why is that?
A: I saw a mouse in my house,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych]!
B: Oh, well, all you need to do is use a trap.
A: I don't have one.
B: Well then, buy one.
A: Can't afford one.
B: I can give you mine if you want.
A: That sounds good.
B: All you need to do is just use some cheese in order to make the mouse come to the trap.
A: I don't have any cheese.
B: Okay then, take a piece of bread and put a bit of oil in it and put it in the trap.
A: I don't have oil.
B: Well, then put only a small piece of bread.
A: I don't have bread.
B: Then what is the mouse doing at your house?!
Submitted by: Genti Biraci
6
What are the three quickest ways of spreading a rumour (or gossip).
Telegram
Telephone
Tell a woman
Perhaps not very politically correct in the times we live in, but worth a slight chuckle.
Submitted by: Dave & Brendan
EDITOR'S NOTE: Maybe you could teach your students the phrase "politically correct" and discuss it.
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7
If you give a man a fish,Dragon Boat Festival,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], he eats for a day.
If you teach a man to fish,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych],[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], he can always eat.
If you give a man a fire, he's warm for a day.
If you light a man on fire,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], he is warm for the rest of his life.
Submitted by: Anonymous
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8
A: Did you hear that a baby was fed on elephant's milk and gained twenty pounds in a week.
B: That's impossible. Whose baby?
A: An elephant's.
Submitted by: Ugur Yavuzturk
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9
"Am I the first man you have ever loved?" he said.
"Of course," she answered "Why do men always ask the same question?".
Submitted by: Ugur Yavuzturk
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10
When I was young I didn't like going to weddings.
My grandmother would tell me,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], "You're next"
However, she stopped doing that after I started saying the same thing to her at funerals.
Submitted by: Chris Fisher