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Really want to become a bully

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room, red walls, red sofas. The white white lights on the ceiling and the red is seriously out of my place in the world. Is the lure? Is a laugh? Seems an invisible force in the forced disappearance of a little bit of my body. Table glowing white eyes slightly pink, pink table, I feel this is slowly increased, between me and her magic into the Milky Way.
I stared at her, as long as she does not go away, the other does not matter. I'm waiting for her to say that counselors do not know the secret of a third person, looking forward to this and makes the Galaxy into a ribbon.
slightly exposed her smile ... ...
I frowned slightly, mind Di Hu, finished. That smile, with irresistible charm, this charm, there is a way to let me fully exposed, their magic, and she became my counselor.
what would be completely exposed, but the thirty years to expose a piece of me here, and in the thirty years of screen, most of my own is silent, but to me the past few years as a counselor self-confidence to fight back Bale.
she was still smiling, silent laughter ... ...

a car sped past, almost dry and cold winter atmosphere sandwiched bring me down, and a dirty will blurt out, and be swallowed my own back, is red in the world gave me her smile cultivation of civilization at the moment. Yes, I psychologist, but also a visionary, or why I always appear in front of her shadow, she was there in the fantasy world, so I was not fascinated by her, off the counseling room After the door I can walk normally on the streets this winter night, the hearts that there is still a trace of self-confidence. Because I am a real person, or just an object, even in a world of fantasy in smoke, but also recovery.
leaves from the hit in the face by the wind, carrying the stubborn attitude of the winter to remind me of the body there. Far away, I do not know what kind of garbage audible, that sound in the night to bring fear to a woman only bring me more beautiful reverie:
I saw she was still laugh.
my outstretched hand on the table and move it slowly towards her.
She looked at me, but did not look into my eyes. I suddenly feel that laughter is like a big net enveloped me, I get smaller, like a swim in a small insect on the table,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], under the watchful eye of her shy stop their attempts.

my body was hit a little, flying two people away in their still shouting against the wind : lovelorn people wandering in the street ... ...
I'm falling out of love it? Has been falling out of love? Perhaps that's it, just do not remember.
street corner in front of a figure standing, flying two people suddenly stop pace, and then quickly escape.
let you in the street talking nonsense! Living to people who lost love can be, it will scare you. A rising sense of pride, but distant twinkling of an eye, when thinking back to the moment, some of the memory transfer by the vague definition.
once, in front of the corner, I heard coughing, and so to my beautiful wife gentle life. She told me afterwards, if not met at the corner that she might meet another boy and married him, she said God may be arranged. I told him that I arranged. In fact, I had known from her work passed around the corner, several pro-in phase, was disdain, or I despise people, I do most of my life choices, that is, in the corner waiting for her .
I do not know the person in front of me is just like the original, a woman waiting in premeditated.

approached, it was not such a woman, but a woman. I'm closer towards her, she shouted at me: \The.
\is my freedom. \Another I told myself that sooner or later one day, I just came from the darkness of the so-called a member of the other counselors to become customers.
However, the woman ran away from me, I heaved a sigh, exhaled air becomes cold and fighting back in my face,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], like his own play as, there is a strange. I want to help her, how the devil himself back into it? Fortunately, not out of the hands of the devil, has groups of the target. This woman is a good woman, disappeared the moment I know good recovery that she saved me. What a vast empty
night ah!
night, I hope the pitch-dark, black to me standing around, you do not know.

years ago, I graduated from a law enforcement unit assigned to. Reach out to those who Qilaobashi charges in front of them is kept much longer than their age, years of alcohol and tobacco, my heart seems to be wearing a steel needle, and my mother sewing a quilt of that needle. At that time, my eyes much more than the black tonight. Leave without pay, move far away and no money to the homeless when a coal mine, coal mine under the beginning of the day, that feeling is really dark, pitch dark.
college, I said that before the three-year-old to play the economy, after a three-year-old to play I like literature, you listen, I used a \I put the economic and literature as a game, this description of my self-confidence. However, the near forty, and nothing to play as, but playing a different game,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], psychological counseling. Statement, but I got through the qualification certificate was shut off, I'm better than anyone the strength of the weak, but I do not mind the game in this call. You do not think that I only know what to play, I also have another legitimate employment, a government agency is a very important position. Limited to government secrets, also limited to the civil servants are not allowed to play out the provisions of other games, I no longer clear.
that the days of walking,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], step by step, you know I was longing for light. In that dark mine, I only spent a day, before fleeing out. After a day wandering life, liberty and painful. Where can a bed, but wherever people seem to have been swept with a broom to walk. Finally I'm home, home pick up the books, parents and older siblings in the school funding went to the southwest, returned home after a few years, are catching up with the city Personnel Bureau recruit civil servants, law enforcement agencies in order to leave the original I signed up, now being admitted, and now I am a major department Personnel in charge. Some people envy you?
that is not implicit, and wordy out. Fills 明人不做暗事.
if someone envy, then I have a enviable job, since it seems one can say that the wife is still Ruhuasiyu, and smart good son, I to have everything, right? But when night fell, while accompanied by a painful feeling of fear will hit, every step I seem to have lost something, what is it? I no longer find that rich, to make money, not earn, I still laugh; I have been working with an enviable, with his wife and children's laughter filled every second, I got a lot, how has have lost the feeling, Am I a greedy person?
not, I will not greedy. From this point on I Gongsifenming can also see that ah. Look here on the streets of the cold, cold crazy night man, I did not take units assigned to my car. I'm stupid? No, otherwise it will not come out the whole of a counseling room. Others even more stupid, it would not look at me to open counseling room, and open one eye and close. We all walk in the way to make money, but I have not make money, but I feel there are other purposes in addition to money, what is it? It is like a shadow following me, but the change will not change with the light coming in front of me, always behind me, pushing me away, I can not see it, that would like to see the **** that I often divorced from the reality of the screen.
around me a lot of psychologists, counselors, originally to solve their own problems and get involved in this sector, but more study, the more dynamic, and to solve their psychological, want to save another. Is not it great? I am also just as great. But my problem is not marriage and love problems. I have a beautiful and gentle wife, at least in my mind is gentle, but also assertive. My son and I can not do without her. Just a few days ago, it would only from the outside to retrieve my little sick cats,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], me and my son wanted to adopt but also to seek her consent first, but his wife agreed, but too serious cat disease, My son and I raised days, not the art back to life, but also identified by the doctors do not heal before throwing to the garbage heap. But I lied, I said to him, I found a small garden to bury the cat. A psychologist, perhaps lie is as it should be, if not lies, how can calm the mind son. In this way, I gave myself a reason to lie.
Oh, sure, I used to be afraid of the dark, afraid of the dark form of each, visible, invisible. May be afraid of the dark, I went to study psychology, but after learning it, as numerous such a person a night, I always look forward to the night in the darker, mothers seem to want to go to enjoy the Okanagan needle, think that the pitch-dark mine ... ...
it is because, when only darkness all around, I am a person who is controlled at the red light, she will appear.
she said, you do not know enough.
her words no sound, but I hear well. She always looked at me quietly, I see the body everywhere are uncomfortable, but I can not concentrate efforts to see her, see through her. Finally, I had to die in their own assumptions, to resist her eyes.
suspended animation a few times, I find myself courageous, especially in her smile the moment, I prefer it to be no cover up her look, she wants to see what I can give her anything, my body, my deepest soul can give her.
but she do not, my extended hand can only be so shy to stiff on the desktop.
she continued to smile, did not reject the initiative did not mean. No, it did not see my extended hand.
my tears almost came out.

tears, so cool ah! No, it's snow. Or not to snow, snow, and is the mother country, how can a firm in the country on the road, stood there looking forward to her son - my return. Ye Hao down, if the snow the day before yesterday, I threw in the rubbish of the kitten's body to no longer be the nature of the wind tearing the posters. Even layer, a thin layer of snow, white, that can cover the very ugly, very nasty stuff, and then only let you feel this woman's skin, a refreshing soft.
woman, a very civilized word. Elegant woman, may be looking up at the approaching men, and dare not say the word; gentle woman, a man approached a very long, but it will get lost principles; cruel woman, man is probably afraid of, that the race is really . If these words in a single woman of her, and that the face of her man, is the fascination, confusion, disappointment, desire. When coupled with man's own contradictions, contradictions that only the word throughout the world. This time, replace the term in relation to the woman a woman; this time, we need a psychologist. Then she smiled at me, need me?
She does not need, or will not let the tears come out I am anxious. Because I'm the face of contradictory set of a woman's man. In front of her, I do not counselors.
smiled at her again, I seemed to have become timid, and thought to play dead to resist her smile, not resistance, is given, based on the way to death I gave her.
times I have no idea if shouting to her: I sometimes really want to become a bully, rich bully, you hijacked, and take you to a solitary South Pacific crazy crazy island.
she can not hear, but smile, no response. I shouted at her smile becomes weaker and weaker, I was really dead ... ...

\that cat in the ground you cold? \and let him drill quilt. \\Since the science of psychology, and try to make himself the counselors, I began to express my heart do not mean that the true language of love, always get from the return of his son and wife. So at the moment, I can happily put his wife in his arms, the cold quilt warm hot take on the task of being down.
heard his wife breathing evenly, and I got out of bed, threw a coat, open notebook, write down today's psychological distance:
Today psychological counseling, is a mother in the night came with a child, I think that should solve the problem of children under the light should not be at night, so I shirk the. The mother and children left, there is a woman ... ...
's that simple sentence, I turn out the light.
refused to stand in the dark toward the bedroom. I'm waiting for more dark moments groping toward the window, hoping the lights on the building opposite can also be turned off.
wife calling my name, I have walked into the bedroom, to feel the warmth.
my head next to the pillow that moment, across from the bedroom window and saw lights on the building is really off, as I deeper into the bed of the world, darkness gone ... ...
not see the light at the moment, darkness does not exist, I would understand.

2009 年 7 Tuesday 14

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