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If you consider a nice guy or gal a doormat, a wimp, a marshmallow -- I agree with you completely. Such a person doesn’t have a chance to succeed in a tough, competitive world in which many other persons are striving for the same things we want for ourselves. The tough-minded guys and gals will run over the wimps in a very short time. I, however don’t think of the doormats of the world as truly nice guys and gals. I see nice persons as competent and intelligent persons who understand the nature of influence, cooperation and persuasion power -- as those who;
And that, I said to the group,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], is my definition of a nice guy or gal, of an authentic, emotionally honest parent, teacher, manager, pastor, military officer or what have you!
So rang out the scorn of a killer talk show host on a television station in Cleveland. When I was on tour in his city, John Kelly quoted Leo Derocher who said just the opposite -- “Nice guys finish last.” Kelly also quoted from books like Winning Through Intimidation, Looking Out For Number ONE and possibly, Succeeding With A Swift Kick To the Groin.
SHARE THE REWARDS OF ACHIEVEMENT WITH THE MEN AND WOMEN WHO HELP THEM SUCCEED
CREATE COMMUNITIES OF SATISFIED ACHIEVERS IN WHICH EVERY PERSON IS A RESPECTED MEMBER
MANAGE INTERPERSONAL RELATIONSHIPS WITH KNOWLEDGE AND WISDOM
John had the people vote again and this time all but two men of the t
That was premature since no one there had any idea what I was teaching in the seminar, but they voted as Kelly asked them to. Many had preconceived notions and about two hundred people in the studio agreed with John. He then asked, How many agree with -- he didn’t actually say it -- this dunce on the stool,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], but his non-verbal communication made his meaning quite clear. John was all geared up to take me apart for writing something he didn’t understand. He pointed to the overwhelming number of hands in the air and said; Take it from there, Doc. Let’s see how you handle this rejection. He sat down in the audience, as all three cameras zoomed in close -- to watch me sweat, I suppose. Because I knew what my program was all about and he didn’t -- I countered by agreeing with the host. I said;
How can anyone with the brain of a cockroach make such a stupid statement?
I folded my arms and sat back on the stool -- waiting, for I had said all I intended to in defense of NICE GUYS AND GALS. So, I waited and waited -- for John to rouse up from his confusion. I could almost hear the gears whirring in his head as first one cam- era and then another zoomed in on me and then on to John and panned the audience be- fore coming back to me and John -- for almost a minute. And that, is an eternity of dead time on television. The camera operators were getting frantic when John finally stood, shook his head to clear his thoughts and muttered right on the air;
Well, I’ll be damned! I never thought of nice guys that way.
John Kelly had done everything except put a dunce-cap on my head as he seated me on a stool before the cameras and, despite his complete ignorance of what I was teaching, proceeded to ridicule my leadership seminar for managers, pastors, teachers and other professionals. He held my book up for the audience of some three hundred people -- with tens of thousands more watching from their homes, and asked;
Most people don’t but we then had a great time on his show. I convinced him my approach is by far the best way to succeeding throughout life, rather than by clawing and screaming, trying to defeat everyone else,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], destroying the relationships that create friend- ship and love, clogging your arteries and corroding the plumbing that keeps you alive -- with bile and acids boiling through your vascular and digestive systems.
Who can believe this drivel? Everyone on earth knows that a nice guy or gal hasn’t a choice in this lousy, rotten world. You gotta be tough and mean to be successful. Everywhere! How many agree with me that this stuff is nonsense? Raise your hands.